Showing posts with label Post 08: If you think again you might be disappointed.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Post 08: If you think again you might be disappointed.. Show all posts

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Week 8 Wrap-Up

Ya, it's that time again, time to wrap up the previous week! Week 8's prompt was:

"If you think again, you might be disappointed."

And this week we had the following stories from our participants:

  • Brooke wrote about a rather sexy deity dude I personally wouldn't mind meeting, except that if he read my thoughts I'd be embarrassed too. :D
  • Michael took the wacky weird Caitlyn chronicles to a whole new level I had never imagined he could - seriously, check it out!
  • Madeline brought us angels with talons, who had only one thought each, and gave us a glimpse of the epic war going on in that world
  • Virginia made herself a woman after my own heart (though admittedly she was already this! :D) by writing about ROCK STARS, baby!
  • Jenn wrote about a down & out teen's sudden rise to fortune, and her struggle to adjust to her new life with her creepily well-adjusted adopted family...and more to come on this shortly, I'm hoping!
  • I wrote about what happens when a teenager suddenly realises she's been bored her entire life
  • And of course Winter brought us Friday's feature story, which I found just as powerful and impacting as pretty much all her work.

All in all, I was excited by and impressed with what I got to read this week! Huge thanks to our participants for making 2011 even more interesting! :)

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Trisha's story pick, Week 8

Oops. Nearly too late, but I am here just in time!!

This week I've opted to feature Madeline's story, even though the other two I had to choose from were brilliant (and of course our Saturday feature was a great read too!). Madeline kinda had me at "one thought". I just love that concept, of knowing you can only have one single thought upon reawakening, and not wanting to waste it. ;)

Warning: if you're not into Lucifer, don't read on.


Once

My eyes opened.

For the first time in seven hundred billion years, too.

When I was created, I was delicate. The galaxies put me to sleep for billions of years until I was strong enough to wake up. They didn’t want me to be disappointed when I finally came back around. So they gave me one thought. “If you think again, you might be disappointed,” the tiny stars told me. It was so innocent. I was weak, I couldn’t stop them.

Besides, I couldn’t think anything of it. I didn’t want to waste my one thought before I had even seen the new world of the future.

I knew I had missed a lot while I was gone. When I finally woke up, there was crying and pain. I heard blood fall and wings shatter.

Then someone walked past me.

He was gorgeous. Stunning. He had silver hair that hung in his narrow face, almost covering his deep brown eyes.

And I thought one thing. “He’s absolutely beautiful.”

He didn’t stop walking though, he paid no attention to me.

Inside I could feel my heart drop, disappointed that there was no one to catch it.

I shivered and opened my white wings. Billions of years worth of black ashes fell off. They slowly fell to the grassy ground and I bit my lip.

I looked around. Everything had changed, and I realized that now there was a sky and light.

Standing up, I buried my talons deeper into the soil. I realized I was down in a valley. Thousand of rocks danced around me. Waterfalls dripped off of the floating mountains, and thousands of castles hid themselves on the mountain sides. I smiled because I knew Creator had done a good job while I was asleep.

“Hello Jerichi,” something whispered in my ear.

I jumped back, surprised. And then I smiled. “Good morning Lisle,” I whispered gently back to the tiny star. She giggled.

But there was still the agonizing crying and screeching. I frowned.

“What have I missed?” I asked.

She stopped moving. “I’m not sure,” she said, but I knew she was lying.

“Honestly Lisle,” I said. “Something is wrong.”

She closed her tiny eyes. “This is war,” she replied, her voice heavy.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Jennifer's Story Pick, Week 8

Oh boy. Two days of snow for me. Thankfully light, but it’s still coming down. I so just want to hibernate right now, but I’m off to Indiana for a secret mission. Hope everyone north of the equator is staying warm. And if you’re south of the equator, have a watermelon mojito smoothie for the rest of us.

And . . . it's . . . week . . . eight. Is it just me or is anyone else surprised that they are still alive?

My feature this week is about three friends starting a band. For that reason alone, it totally reminds me of Trisha, who had a band (or maybe a few bands?!). It also reminds me of a couple of friends who are skipping the rest of winter and heading out to Morocco to teach drumming for the next few weeks. Here's Virginia's story.

I never wanted to be a rock star – Zoe put me up to it. But then, she tended to lead us in nearly all of our antics. So when she decided we should make a band and get a house, we made it happen. On my dime, of course – it only made sense that I spend all that money that my parents gave to me upon reaching adulthood on something.
Of course, one could blame it all on the fact I already played the drums. For all my parent’s flaws, buying me a real drum kit and getting me a proper instructor was a wise choice. Even as a baby, I’d beat on everything that I could, and when I was denied, I’d try to destroy things in earnest. Not that anyone outside of my family probably knows or realizes, but I have some severe rage. Drumming has always been a way to channel that, and actually having a talent for it… Zoe always compared it to Keith Moon, her unjaded jade eyes glazed with dreams and ruminations.
Perhaps I gave her too much power in my life, but what choice did I have? I had no siblings; my parents thought the correct course of parenting was to buy me off at every possible juncture. This strange and cherished friend of mine who, miracle of miracles, liked me for me was too precious a commodity to squander. Zoe was like that with everyone – she treated people kindly, and managed to somehow seem almost oblivious to those who would wish her poorly. Not that she was invincible, far from it – if she was truly upset, she had no qualms with being true to herself and curling up to sob quietly. She never tried to make a scene – she just was.
But that was only the outer layer; beyond that, there was someone determined to take life by the balls and make life her bitch. Zoe always knew what she wanted in life, and it was about the same as what anyone wanted in high school – to grow up to be rich and famous, to be a big rock and roll star. I gave up on trying to make it clear to her that money couldn’t buy happiness; if it were, I wouldn’t’ve been cutting, getting high, and hiding from the world. No, I would’ve been doing the Charleston on a flagpole while singing glories of glories if money did buy happiness, but that’s just not a fact that ever sinks in to those who have wants, if not needs. That’s why I find it hard to say that she used me, per se – I guess it would’ve seemed that way to most, but really, she knew I’d give her everything I had to make her smile, to make her happy. That’s what sisters do, right?

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Galatea's Eyes

I had some fun with this one.


-----------------

She is the eighth. She appears in a swirl of dust, and he scrutinizes the lace around her neck. It flowers out from her prominent collarbones, clinging to her frail neck, wrapping around her bony shoulders. The rest of the dress clings tight to her anorexic angles, and her weary left eye—the only one visible past a curtain of dark hair—stares as if he were her savior. Not into his eyes, though. They never do.

Yes, he thinks. Beautiful. How he has wished for someone this glorious!

He raises his hand and brushes back the thin hair from her cheek. As the shadow lifts from her face, he recoils and realizes the blemish. The disfiguration is hideous to behold. That eye socket is healed over, puckered and concave, as if the eye were removed and the lid sewn shut.

He shakes his head, and the eighth vanishes. Something inside him laments his inability to create perfection—but he knows it is not his place to create perfection. That would be His place. All he wishes is someone good enough.

So he tries again, taking a seat on the ground, his bare chest glistening with perspiration. He closes his eyes and imagines.

It is not long before another the ninth springs into existence, this one even more waiflike than the last. She is small, corpse-thin, her knees jutting out in thick knobs from her meatless thighs. This girl is clad in white shorts and a black t-shirt that swallows her torso.

She observes him. His beautiful eyes intimidate her, electric blue and piercing to the bone. There is hardly any distance from her skin to the bone, but his eyes pierce nonetheless.

"Yes," he mutters, rising gracefully to his feet. She cringes back from his tall body, her lips parting slightly as she stares him in the eye. He is taken by surprise.

This one is different. She looks at him as though they were equals, making eye contact and holding it. No matter that she looks afraid—the creation is always afraid of its creator. But it is to be noted that she dares to meet his gaze.

He lifts his hand to her cheek. The soft contact makes her stiffen, her jaw setting in stubbornness. She has green eyes, wild untamable green eyes, and he smiles.

Against her will, she is taken by his beauty. Awe strikes her, but she does not let it show.

He traces his fingers down her side, over the jutting bone of her hip. Her size fills him with satisfaction—the most beautiful size, purged of all evil, purged of all humanity, leaving only the soul. This one’s soul glares out from her face in sharp relief. This is the one. This is the one he was born to build.

He leans down to kiss her, but she smacks her bony hands onto his chest and shoves him back.

His eyes snap open and he glares, open-mouthed and shocked by her insolence.

She glares back, venom pervading her expression. There is a minute of ringing silence between them.

Perhaps he was wrong.

He comes closer again, more aggressively this time, but she catches his face in her hands and says, "No."

He is rooted in place by the word. She should not speak. He did not create her to speak.

But he fears cancelling her. She is physical glory like he has never managed.

So he stares, and waits, and debates, his chin wrapped in her cold, strong fingers, his eyes mystified.

Eventually her joints uncurl from his face, and he takes a small step back. Far enough that she lowers her hand. Still close enough that he could lean in and taste her breath. "You speak," he says.

"I do." Her voice is high, clear, and strong. It is a voice that could go for miles.

"What do you wish?"

She lowers her eyelids once, slowly, before answering. Her spindly eyelashes stretch shadows across her hollow face. "I wish that you may perceive not your thoughts but your needs."

His cheeks redden. His skin seems to glow gold with fervor as he replies. "You presume much."

"And what, pray, do I presume, Alion?"

Alion clenches his jaw. He does not know how she knows his name. "You presume that I care to be advised by your ilk. You presume that I take stock in that which I have already, and with reason, suppressed."

"And you have suppressed me?" Her deep green eyes sparkle with impish daring, and she slides her fingers down his sweaty chest. She can feel his heart beating faster under her touch. Stepping closer, she wraps an arm around his back, leaning her cheek against his torso. "Why have you suppressed me?" He can feel her throat vibrating against him, can feel the whisper of her lips against his slick skin.

"I have."

"Why, Alion?" There is a dark smile in her voice, a filthy smile.

"Siren!" Flustered, he forces her away. "I must not admit to my attraction. Suppression is the natural consequence."

She reads his pause. "…and yet…"

"And yet," he says, looking her up and down, "there is always some flaw, Galatea."

"And mine?"

Alion shakes his head, his dark hair sticking to his forehead. He is too aware of the shape of her, too aware of the knowledge in her eyes, too aware that he wants her—"Your voice."

"Fatal?"

"Perhaps." He swallows, forcing his eyes away. This one is too much trouble. This one cannot be stood. This one questions where she should not.

"Consider the challenge," Galatea says, licking her dry lips. "Appreciate how I compensate for all that you take from my body." She looks down at her bonelike calves, at her skeletal arms. "Appreciate how I compensate for your weakness."

He meets her eyes, and there is some understanding between them. He knows she is right. She knows she is right. Most of all, she knows he is too cowardly to care.

She closes her eyes as he cancels her.

Alion sits down and tries again. Number ten is missing an arm. Number eleven is missing a leg. Number twelve is missing a nose.

Number thirteen is a carbon copy of Galatea. And she does not speak.

Alion rejoices and moves to kiss her.

But he has hardly touched his lips to hers before he recoils. She is cold, hard stone. She is soulless, voiceless, and as he stares into her eyes he cannot call her Galatea. And neither can she.

-----------------------------

(Author's note: I kept the name Galatea because it's beautiful, but I shortened Pygmalion of legend (who fell in love with his own creation) to simply 'Alion'. I thought it lent an appropriate sort of bizarro feel to the work.)

Monday, February 21, 2011

PROMPT NUMBER EIGHT

Write a short story of 1,000-10,000 words based on the following:

"If you think again, you might be disappointed."

See ya later in the week! Have fun. :)